Ch 44 - Kiwi

But it’s so strange, it’s something new
Amazing feelings that I have for you
I close my eyes when I’m alone
Wonder what it’d be like to make you moan

“Kiwi” – Maroon 5

I peeked my eyes open to find sunshine streaming into my window. I turned my head and glanced at the clock, gasping. It was past noon already. I sat up quickly—too quickly—and felt my vision go hazy as dizziness took over. I closed my eyes to ward it off and when I reopened them, Edward stood in front of me.

“Good morning,” he said sweetly, smiling. “Did you sleep well?”

I nodded, smiling. It was Tuesday the 12th—the day Edward and I would be celebrating my birthday. I had no idea what he had planned, I only hoped the sunshine outside wouldn’t ruin it.

“The sun’s shining,” I said hesitantly, slightly sad. I nearly laughed out loud at the fact that seeing the sun shining made me sad. I hated the dreary weather, always loved the sun in Phoenix.

“It’s okay,” he said, still smiling. “It’ll work out.”

As he said that, the sun faded, going behind a cloud. I laughed.

“Are you sure you’re not the psychic?”

“Positive,” he said confidently. “I’m actually about to run an errand, now that the sun’s hiding. Get up and get something to eat and get ready, I’ll be back in a few hours.”

“Any clues on what we’re doing?” He shook his head. “So what am I supposed to wear?”

“Whatever Alice bought you to wear,” he said simply. “She said she had that part covered.”

I smiled, nodding. His eyes lingered on me for a moment before he turned and headed out of the apartment. I jumped up and ran to the window in enough time to see him duck inside the Volvo before the sun reappeared.

I moseyed into the kitchen and made some toast, spreading peanut butter on it. I ate it quickly before heading to the bathroom to shower.

I washed my hair and body, taking the time to thoroughly shave since I’d be wearing a dress. After I got out of the shower I wrapped a towel around my body and blow-dried my hair. I glanced in the mirror, part of me wishing Alice were here to doll me up. The fact that she wasn’t made me slightly suspicious though—it wasn’t like Alice to miss an opportunity like this.

I walked into the bedroom and pulled the dress out of my closet. I hesitated, glancing at it, feeling slightly ridiculous to be dressing up so much. I was also nervous naturally, considering it cost a small fortune.

My phone rang, startling me. I walked over and picked it up, laughing as I glanced at the screen. Speak of the devil.

“Hey Alice,” I said as I answered.

“Hey Bella!!” she sounded chipper, excited. “I’m just calling to make sure you wear what I bought you.”

“I am, I’m about to put the dress on right now.”

“What about the other stuff?” she asked. I was quiet for a moment, stalling. She sighed loudly. “Bella Swan, get the bag out of your closet and put it on! I mean it! Don’t make me come there!”

I laughed and dug through the bottom of the closet, pulling the pink and white bag out.

“Why aren’t you here, anyway? I gotta say I’m surprised.”

“I know,” she said, her voice slightly whiney—she was pouting. “I was going to but Edward would probably dismember me if I showed up there. He’s avoiding me.”

“Yeah I saw him ignoring your calls. He won’t tell me why though, just babbles about you being wrong about something.” I pulled the lingerie out of the bag, eyeing it cautiously. “Are you sure about this thing, Alice? I mean, I’m really supposed to wear this?”

She laughed. “Yes, I’m sure Bella. You deserve to feel sexy and you will, trust me. And as for Edward, he’s just stubborn. I’m not wrong, he just won’t admit it. It doesn’t matter though, he’ll know soon enough.”

There was a smile in her voice that made me apprehensive. “What does he think you’re wrong about?” I asked suspiciously.

“You’ll see,” she said. I groaned, rolling my eyes. Of course she wouldn’t tell me either.

“Anyway, I’m going to go put this sleazy monstrosity on and cover it up with my entirely too expensive dress now.”

Alice laughed and said goodbye, hanging up. I dropped my towel and slipped the lingerie on quickly before I could think about it too much. I pulled out the thigh highs and slid them up my legs and attached the garters to them to make sure they stayed. I hesitantly walked to the bathroom and peeked in the mirror, gasping at the sight of myself. I smiled lightly as I looked myself over—Alice had, of course, been right. I felt sexy.

I went back into the bedroom and put my dress on. I struggled a bit getting the back of it zippered up and caught my finger in it, successfully cutting myself with the zipper. A few drops of blood came out, the rusty smell making me queasy. I sat down on the bed to stabilize myself. Once my strength returned, I went back into the bathroom and washed the blood off of my finger.

I pulled my hair up halfway, not bothering much with it. I did put on slightly more makeup than usual, lip-gloss and eyeliner and mascara. I put earrings in and put on a silver necklace.

I walked back into the bedroom and glanced at my shoes. I desperately wanted to throw on my converse but had a feeling Alice would hunt me down if she found out. I instead grabbed some black dress shoes, one of the few pairs I owned that had heels.

I sat down on the bed to put them on when the front door opened. I got up and walked to the living room and gasped when I saw him.

He looked devastatingly handsome. He had on a pair of loose-fitting khaki’s and a black button down oxford shirt. He had a black, grey, and gold Gucci tie around his neck, knotted loosely, and his sleeves were rolled up to expose his forearms. He could pass as being dressed up but he came off really casual.

He was peering at me, his gaze intense. He was standing completely still, the front door of the apartment still hanging open.

“You look amazing,” he said after a moment, his eyes scanning the length of my form. I blushed, smiling.

“Thank you. You do too.”

He smiled, finally coming out of his stupor and closing the door. His eyes narrowed slightly as he turned back to me. “You were bleeding,” he said matter-of-factly.

I nodded. “Uh, yeah. Cut my finger on the zipper of this dress. How’d you know?”

“I can smell it,” he said softly. I muttered a quick apology and he waved me off, smiling. “Are you ready to go?”

I nodded and walked forward. He grasped my hand, bringing it up to his mouth to place a light kiss on the back of it. When he brought it back down he intertwined our fingers and led me out of the apartment. I glanced to him with surprise when instead of the Volvo parked across the street in his usual spot, it was his Aston Martin Vanquish. He cherished that car, kept it guarded at all times.

“I’m guessing this was your errand?” I asked as we approached the sleek black vehicle. He nodded, helping me into the passenger seat.

“It’s a special occasion.” He climbed in and shot me a quick smile, starting the car up and pulling away from the curb.

He drove through Seattle and I turned to him, in shock, as he pulled toward the El Gaucho Restaurant. It was notorious, quite upscale and totally out of my league.

“What are we doing here?” I whispered, a slight hint of panic in my voice.

He turned his head to me and smiled. “You need to eat.”

He pulled up in front of the restaurant and helped me out of the car, hesitating briefly before handing the keys to the valet.

“Scratch it and die,” he said, his voice low but menacing. I felt a shiver go down my spine and my heart started racing. The valet, a man that looked to be about our age, recoiled away from Edward’s hostility.

Edward took my hand again and pulled me to the front doors. A man standing there smiled at him, nodding in acknowledgement.

“Ah, Mr. Cullen, how great to see you! We have everything all set up for you.”

Edward thanked him, and we followed the guy inside to a small room with a single table in it. We sat down and the man handed us menu’s, asking for our drink orders.

“Just water,” I muttered, glancing at the prices on the menu in front of me. My eyes widened and I shot Edward a look of disbelief. A night here could easily cost more than one months rent, and I didn’t even want to know how much he paid for the isolated table.

Edward chuckled at my expression, shaking his head lightly. He turned to the waiter and smiled. “Sparkling Veuve Clicquot Ponsardin Yellow Label,” he said.

“Bottle or glass?”

“Just a glass.”

The waiter nodded and walked away. I stared at Edward with confusion. “What did you just order?”

Edward chuckled, running his hand through his hair. “Sparkling Veuve Clicquot Ponsardin Yellow Label,” he said, cocking an eyebrow at me as if I’m supposed to know what that means.

“And that is…?”

“Wine,” he said with a shrug. I gasped, dropping my menu. I leaned toward him.

“I didn’t think alcohol did anything to you,” I said with shock. I’d always been under the impression that he was pretty much immune to all forms of drugs and alcohol, anything he took would simply sit in his stomach until he forced it back out because he didn’t have any blood pumping through his body to absorb it.

“It doesn’t. Emmett tried once, that was a disaster,” he said, rolling his eyes and shaking his head.

“Then why’d you order wine?” I asked, confused.

He smiled, cocking an eyebrow at me. “It’s not for me Bella.”

My eyes widened. “You’ve gotta be kidding. You ordered wine for me?! I’m not even 21 Edward, that’s illegal.”

He laughed loudly, shaking his head. “You have no problem dating a vampire, someone designed by nature to murder humans, but you’re concerned about whether or not underage drinking is morally sound?”

I glared at him for a moment before picking my menu back up, not saying a word. I scanned through the wine list and groaned. “$26? Seriously? For a glass of wine?”

He sighed. “Bella, please. Let me do this, okay?” I glanced up at him and our eyes met. I saw the pleading in them, the desire. I sighed and nodded, playfully pretending to zip my lips. Edward smiled, his features relaxing immediately.

I glanced through the dinner menu, trying to only read the names and stay away from prices, but those pesky numbers kept catching my attention. “You’re going to have to order for me,” I mumbled. He chuckled and nodded, not looking at all surprised.

The waiter returned with our drinks. Edward ordered Chateaubriand and Lobster for Two, which of course turned out to be the most expensive thing on the menu.

After the waiter departed again, Edward held out the glass of wine to me. I took it hesitantly, bringing it up to my nose and smelling. “Are you sure about this? I mean, I’m a recovering drug addict Edward, should I be drinking?” I whispered.

He narrowed his eyes at me slightly, his expression completely serious. “It’s fine Bella, you have nothing to worry about. If you don’t want to drink it you don’t have to, I just figured you’d feel more comfortable dancing this way.”

My eyes widened. “Dancing?” He nodded, raising an eyebrow at me, daring me to argue. I hesitated briefly, before bringing the glass to my lips and taking a big swig of it.

The only time I’d ever drank alcohol was at the Valentine’s Day party that forever altered my life. I had no desire to try it after that. But this—this was amazing. It was slightly citrus with a hint of caramel apple, but not too sweet.

I took another sip and glanced up to see Edward watching me, smiling. “I can’t believe you of all people are condoning this,” I muttered as I set the glass down.

“You’re a woman now Bella, there’s nothing wrong with indulging a bit.”

The waiter returned with our food. I picked at it and ate until I was full, but I barely put a dent into it. After Edward was confident I ate enough, he stood up and held his hand out to me. “Dance with me,” he said.

I glanced at his hand, cautiously bringing my own to place it in his. I grabbed the glass of wine and downed the rest of it quickly before standing up.

Edward chuckled as he led me out of the small room and into another larger one. There were a few other couples there and a live band playing soft jazz music. He pulled me out to a small dance floor and turned to face me. He placed his hands on my hips and pulled me close to him, while I reached up and wrapped my arms around his neck.

I was a bit nervous, slightly tense which Edward sensed. He leaned down so his lips were at me ear. “Relax,” he whispered. His cool breath blew across my cheek and I shivered, closing my eyes. I felt myself relaxing nearly instantly, my entire body tingling. I wasn’t sure if it was because of Edward or because of the champagne, but whatever it was, it was working.

We swayed to the music for a while, staring in each other’s eyes. He’d reach down and softly kiss my lips occasionally while my fingers found their way into his hair. I found it was quite easy, not as big of a deal as I thought. Him and I seemed to melt together, perfectly in sync. It felt nice being in his arms—it felt right.

He eventually pulled away, bringing his hands off of my hips and taking my hand in his. I glanced around, taken back by the fact that the room was now crowded. Time seemed to have stood still, everything except for Edward disappearing while we were on the dance floor.

He led me out of the room and into the bar area of the restaurant. He found the man that had greeted us at the door earlier in the evening and whispered something to him. The man nodded.

Edward led me over to the bar and caught the attention of the bartender. The bartender handed him a drink and Edward held it out to me. “Vanilla Truffle Martini, it’s supposed to be good,” he said with a shrug. He led me across the room to where a piano sat. Edward sat down at the bench and pulled me down beside him.

Edward started playing while I sipped on my drink, completely mesmerized by him. He was so magnificent, gorgeous and talented. I watched in awe as his fingers flitted over the keys, occasionally so fast and passionately his fingers were nearly a blur, other times slow and sensual, his fingers almost caressing them.

When my drink was empty, a lady was at my side instantly handing me another one. I took it happily, already feeling slightly buzzed. This continued on for a while—some of the songs I recognized, other ones completely unfamiliar to me and I ventured to guess they were his very own creations.

As I finished up my 3rd martini, Edward slowly started playing the lullaby he had written for me. I closed my eyes and leaned up against him, reveling in the melody, feeling every ounce of love he was pouring into it. He rounded out the last few notes and stopped. Clapping rang out instantly and my eyes popped open, scanning the room. The place was packed.

Edward smiled politely. He grabbed the glass from my hand and sat it down, pulling me up. He intertwined our fingers and walked me through the room, thanking people who complimented him on his playing.

He paused briefly at the front of the restaurant, pulling out his American Express. I didn’t look at the total, not wanting to know how much Edward had paid for this night for me. It couldn’t have been cheap.

Edward and I walked outside and I shivered as the cool air hit me. I was flushed, the alcohol in my system warming me from the inside. Thankfully the valet pulled up with the Aston Martin quickly and Edward helped me in the passenger seat.

“Thank you,” I said. “That was really a lot of fun.”

Edward chuckled, reaching over and squeezing my hand. “You’re welcome. You should drink more often, you’re more cooperative with alcohol in your system.”

I stuck my tongue out at him playfully. Edward pulled out onto the highway and started heading south. I looked at him questioningly, as the apartment was in the opposite direction.

“Where are we going?”

“I thought we could stay somewhere else tonight,” he said shrugging. I smiled and nodded.

I gazed over at Edward as he drove. His pale skin almost glowing in the moonlight, a small smile playing on his lips. He seemed quite relaxed, happy.

He pulled outside of the city limits, onto a slightly isolated road. He drove for a few minutes, passing a few houses but everything else was mainly woods. He slowed after awhile, pulling onto a dirt driveway to the left.

He drove down the narrow road slowly, as it was bumpy and he obviously had no desire to hurt his car. There was nothing but trees on either side of us, no sign of any civilization. After awhile the trees started to thin and we came out to a clearing. In the middle of the clearing stood a gorgeous cabin. It looked homely, welcoming.

Edward pulled up in front of the cabin and got out. I stepped out of the car, smiling. He led me up onto the porch and pulled his keys out of his pocket. He unlocked the cabin door and motioned for me to enter

I gasped when I stepped inside. It was completely furnished and had a warm feel to it, the entire place done in brown and gold and black.

“This is amazing,” I said, glancing around. Edward closed the door, locking it, and smiled.

“Yeah, it’s nice,” he said with a shrug. He walked over and sat down on the black leather couch while I roamed around, taking everything in.

“Whose place is this anyway?” I asked.

“Mine.”

I swung around quickly, not taking into account that I was still buzzed and lost my balance. Edward shot up quickly, catching me.

“Yours?” I asked incredulously.

He smiled lightly and nodded. “Yeah. I bought it when you were in the hospital so I didn’t have to commute from Forks.”

“Oh,” I said simply. I knew that Edward had been in Seattle as long as me, never too far away, but it never really struck me that he had to have stayed somewhere during that time.

When Edward was confident I was stable on my own two feet, he let go of me and walked into the kitchen. “Do you want something to drink?”

“Uh, sure. Do you have any wine?”

Edward laughed. “I’ve created a monster,” he muttered, opening the fridge and glancing around inside. He grabbed a bottle of water and handed it to me. “I think you’ve had enough alcohol.”

Edward took my hand and led me over to the couch. I sat down while he walked over to a desk in the corner. He opened a drawer and pulled out a lighter, walking around the room and lighting a few candles sitting around. He then went over and lit a fire in the fireplace. He put the lighter back and turned the lights off, leaving the room dim with a subtle orange glow. It was gorgeous, romantic.

He smiled and approached me, sitting down on the couch. He lay back and pulled me to him so I lay on top of him.

He gazed in my eyes for a moment, his stare so passionate it was almost startling. His features were soft, relaxed, but there was an intensity in his eyes. A dozen different emotions bubbled below the surface, taking turns shining through. The fervor of it caused my heart to race, the adoration evident in his expression sending shockwaves to my soul.

Edward leaned his head up slightly and his lips pressed against mine. The kiss was soft, sweet, full of love. He pulled back after a second to look into my eyes, before pressing his lips to mine again. This kiss was stronger, more forceful, passionate. There was power behind it, desire brewing between both of us as our lips moved together in harmony. His cool breath sent shivers down my spine, the sweetness of it completely intoxicating. I felt his tongue sweep across my lips and moaned.

He brought his lips from mine and moved down my jaw and neck, placing kisses on every inch of skin there. I stretched my neck, throwing my head back to give him better access. His hand came up and his fingers ran through my hair, pushing the locks back and out of the way. My eyes fluttered closed.

I felt Edward’s other hand rubbing circles on my hip. He shifted it after a moment, running his hand across the small of my back. He brought his lips back over to mine and I gasped at how deeply he kissed me. He pulled back immediately, obviously realizing he was being borderline reckless by bringing his teeth so close to the fragile skin of my lips, but he didn’t completely break the kiss.

My leg was falling asleep so I shifted on top of him to find a more comfortable position. Edward hissed when my thigh grazed his erection, the obvious bulge in his pants pressing into my leg. My eyes shot to his quickly, to gauge whether or not I needed to get up, and the fire in his eyes shocked me. I felt my body warm instantly, tingling going down my spine and straight to my core.

Edward inhaled and closed his eyes briefly. When they reopened, the desire was still present. He leaned up and captured my lips with his again, the kiss gentle but passionate.

I wanted him, more than I’d ever wanted anything in my life. The feeling of his lips against mine, the feeling of his hands on me, was driving me to the brink of madness. My body wasn’t my own anymore, it was overtaken by some outside force pushing me forward, screaming for release. I didn’t just want him—I needed him. I needed him like the air I breathed.

“Touch me,” I whispered when he pulled his lips away to give me a chance to breath. He paused briefly before bringing his hands up to run them gently across my stomach and up toward my breasts. His hands ghosted across my breasts and even through my layers of clothing I felt the electricity, my nipples hardening upon even the lightest of his touches.

I needed to feel him, needed his hands all over me. The parts of me never before touched by a man screamed for his hands to explore them. “More,” I breathed, barely audible but loud enough that Edward would easily hear. He pushed us up into a sitting position, his lips lingering on my neck, and gently pushed me backwards onto my back. Edward hovered over top of me, his cool breath on my exposed skin while his hand ran down the length of my body, grazing over my breasts and down my stomach, making his way to my thigh. He paused briefly, his hand coming to rest on my knee, before slowly running his hand upward under my dress.

He kept his hand on my outer thigh, not coming near the part of me that throbbed for his attention. He hit the top of my stockings and froze when his fingers connected with the garter, groaning

His hand on my thigh was beautiful torture, fueling me on. He was so close, his fingertips a mere few inches away. I pulled my knees up, opening my legs wider, begging him with my body.

“Please Edward,” I mumbled. “I need you.” Tortured groans were escaping his throat. He pulled back to look at me, the expression on his face staggering. He wanted me as much as I wanted him, lust clouding his face, but under the surface was troubling. There was a bit of disbelief and confusion, but mostly there was fear. Pure raw fear mixed with pure raw lust. He wanted to touch me like I wanted him to touch me, he wanted to feel me like I wanted to feel him, but he was scared. Scared of what that would mean, where that would lead, what could possibly happen. He was afraid of hurting me, and I was afraid of being hurt, but our fears were different. He didn’t want to break any of my bones, whereas I was only worried about him breaking my heart.

Because we were at the line, and the moment we crossed it we simply just couldn’t turn back. I was giving myself up to him, knowing all of the potential consequences, knowing I could be asking for death. My life could be ended easily, in a split second, because what I was asking of Edward was for him to let go. For him to let some of his walls crumble, let a bit of his instincts shine through, let his control slip a bit. And that frightened him, but I had faith that even if he let his desire take over, he’d still protect me. He’d still keep me safe. Sparing my life was second nature to him, it was instinctual. And that irrational hormonal teenager that still existed somewhere inside of me hinted that maybe if he didn’t protect me, maybe if I did meet my demise, then maybe it would all be worth it just for the chance to experience him fully.

But I knew if I crossed that line, if I gave myself to him and he accepted it, I’d never be able to walk away from him. I’d never be able to give him up. I wasn’t just giving him my body, I was giving him my soul, silently begging him to take it. We wouldn’t just be connecting physically, but we’d be connecting spiritually. I knew Edward thought he was soulless, that he was forsaken, but I disagreed. Edward had a soul and a beautiful one at that. And after we crossed that line, our souls would be coming together along with our bodies, but unlike our bodies our souls would never again part. He’d be a part of me for as long as I walked the earth, be it 30 years or 30 centuries, and I’d be a part of him eternally.

And I knew if that line got crossed and Edward one day chose to walk away again, it would end me… because I couldn’t survive with half of a soul.